Excerpt from Her Healing: A Workbook for Grieving Mothers

From Andi Thompson, author of the blog heysweetmama.com:

We have an amazing capacity to create. I’d take it as far to say I believe we were born to create. Here’s an excerpt from my book Her Healing: A Workbook for Grieving Mothers focusing on allowing our creative capacity to be a part of our healing.   

After about three months, it hit me. Before I ever got pregnant, I had made a goal to not get pregnant again until after I had returned to my prepregnancy weight. My first response was to feel sorry for myself. If I actually had a baby, a subsequent pregnancy wouldn’t be so urgent. After feeling sorry for myself, I could see the truth and the truth was that the scale wasn’t budging. I didn’t want this goal to weigh on me, so I changed my focus from wanting to get pregnant to preparing my body for the kind of pregnancy I wanted. Instead of obsessing about another baby, I decided to throw my energy into “creating” health. Although I didn’t phrase it that way, looking back, my quest for recovering my health was a very important part of my healing process. I started training for sprint triathlons and a half marathon. I focused my energy into healthy eating and taking care of my body. In the process, I started to experience JOY again. As I look back on that time, it was like my progression was stopped in its tracks when my pregnancy ended with having a stillborn baby. Everything about me (emotionally, physically, and spiritually) had been focused on the baby girl I was growing. When my hopes for that baby disappeared, I became lost. I took time to mourn the loss, and eventually, I was ready to focus more on progress and less on hurting. 

When people ask me what I did to heal, I share that I focused on my health and became active. I’ve come to realize that health and fitness are one option; however, there are many more ways to heal. Overall, it’s important to create something or work toward a goal; each person will discover what that goal is. I chose fitness and health, while others might choose to renovate a bathroom, plant a garden, or adopt a puppy. Take the creative energy that you’d intended to use for your little one and put it to good use for yourself and the world around you. By being an active participant in the creative process, we are becoming more like the [God]. All of us are created in His image (Genesis 1:27) with similar capacity. The healing of our broken hearts continues as we partner with Him to manifest this creative power in whatever way we feel inspired.


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